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Saturday, February 13, 2010

My Sweet Hearts...

I havent posted my hearts everyday but here they are...This one of coarse I made...but I love it..Thats my head in the middle ..


Here we go another Gloria made heart ...Ive had a weird week in my head..I can Honestly say that I haven't believed that I have been sad...I was lying to myself..I guess I have been..Yesterday, I drove around and just cried..My crying comes from deep inside I guess..either that or its just there...Are you loving my insight..I don't know what my deal is..I guess having my kids all the time and knowing they need there dad and having him live 18 hours away is sad. I guess knowing life as I knew it.. is gone now..I guess I am scared of the future and what it holds for us. I guess I miss being a wife,Yup. I am going through different levels of sadness and I am or have had a happy life and my heart is generally happy so I am letting myself be sad when it comes but am also letting it go and not hanging on to it...I feel like my being is living in a place were you never know what the weather is going to be like...so some days I need an umbrella and some days I am wearing my cute sunglasses because its so sunny....hmmm..What to do....well I guess just accepting things the way they are..Loving the people around me...Loving my life with my 3 fun kids..I do understand that this is a process and I am in the middle...Which means I am moving forward..(right)
I do love that Chrissy had this great search for hearts ...I loved being on the look out...Thanks Chrissy...I will be celebrating Valentines Day tomorrow at the San Dieugito half Marathon..It starts at 7:30 and since its a hilly run I hope to come in under 2 hours...So that makes me super DE duper Happy...I am telling you exercise is the best way I find happiness and clarity..I will be running with my dad and some great friends too....I hope you have a great LOVE day...if you find your self feeling sad because LOVE day can sometimes do that...go for a long walk outside..Love you and Happy valentines Day..

6 comments:

Mindy Lacefield said...

i love this honest, vulnerable post. i love you. i hope you find your load just a tad lighter after that race. i agree, to run is to purge out everything that is bad and take in all that is good. my mind, i find, is clear. (now go kick some major ass!) miss you girl.

Todd said...

I'm sure your positive and wise outlook on things will carry you through until the mourning period has passed. I am encouraged every time I read about how you deal with your pain.

We will be back at wcrr 2/27. Some Saturday we'd love to go to breakfast with you and your Uncle Mike as you have mentioned. When that day gets closer I'll check in to see what your schedule is.

Kolleen said...

love you sweet beautiful honest gloria!!!

you ARE moving forward....all will be okay and i think is really good that you are letting yourself feel the sadness and not trying to run from it! i didn't let myself really "feel" my sadness for years and it was really an unhealthy thing to do!

you are so brave and wise...run, run like the wind tomorrow!!!

loving you on love day!! and always!!
xxoo
k

allyson joy said...

It's too bad you can't get a photo of your own heart, it's one of the prettiest hearts I've ever seen in my life. As things go up and down in your life, know that you are loved and adored by do many, myself at the top of the list. Thank you for being amazing and sharing yourself with us. Take care and I'm just a phone call away and I'll come visit you my friend,,, and you're right, your three kids are amazing. Love you G!!!
{xoxo}

patty said...

Dear Gloria, As others have said, you are so doing the right thing by just putting it out there, recognizng your feelings and expressing them!! That's half the battle, girl! Then those that love you can give their support and really get it. And I love that you are using exercise to help you feel better. What could be healthier or a better example for your kids???
Hugs to you and good luck tomorrow!!!

marilyn said...

i get you, bird. thanks for putting yourself out here in this safe place full of hearts that hold yours tenderly.