|Holy Cow Batman that was fast . |
I just had my birthday and turned 44. I woke up on my birthday and for the first time in many, many years I had no anxiety about getting older or needing things to be different. This year I woke up and I knew that I am on the path I am supposed to be on. I am right where I am supposed to be. It was a great feeling.
I woke up made breakfast for my teenagers and then drove them to school . Then my little man and I went on a walk and even that was a sign that I was where I needed to be. My dad took me out to lunch and Jack and I went for a swim in the early afternoon. SO far so good. I drove home and picked up the my kids and reminded them it was my birthday !! They gave a me a hug and all was good in the world. Then later than night I went out dinner at a Mexican food restaurant that had mariachi. It was a really good day. My big sister sang Happy Birthday to me and that made it a complete. The best part was through out the day I felt settled. I did not feel sad at all. There are so many reasons or stories I had told myself in the past that just made my birthday's feel so melancholy. One of the things I have learned in this past year is to try to be present and with that comes learning about the self talk. Its really crazy the things we tell ourselves or the negative self talk that goes on in our brain. I have been consistently working on that and lately something clicked where I now feel a calmness within me because that talk has gone down a level its mostly positive. I am giving myself a break now. I feel like I have earned it.
It is nice to just be present and I also changed my view on WS. I am going to go into the race grateful to be there and grateful for every mile I am able to run. I will be proud of myself for even showing up and taking part of something that is so much bigger than me . I am going to enjoy the journey and stop stressing so much about everything else. My birthday wish is that my feet heal well and world peace. Happy Trails .