Happy Weekend

The weekend is here and if you live in  San diego then you can hear the rain just like me. I love the sound of the rain its so beautiful. I am slowly working on my sister love portrait. I feel like I might need longer hair. I was reading today about how great it is to be an amature at something you love because then you can just try it everything about your passion as you learn about it. That is so true. I am loving spending a little bit of time each day just exploring my love for these paint brushes.  I hope you get to practice what you love this weekend even if its 20 minutes.. 

Painting my sister and late night thoughts

I had this dream about my sister Carmen and I then this picture happened. I miss her sweet touch and her littleness. I am going o go visit her this weekend for sure. I was watching a video from an on line class I am taking and she said to just relax with your stroke. I don't know why this stayed with me but it did. Just relax with my brush stroke and keep the brush moving. Its crazy how much alike running and painting are in my head. Its the same thing with running that make s a difference for long distances. Time on your feet . Painting too. Time with the paint brush in my hand. 

I know exactly what I am painting but I do fuss over the colors I want to use way to much.
Let go G..Just go G ..That's my painting mantra. I will finish this tomorrow night as soon as baby Jack goes to sleep. I love that I am so tired but I am fighting it because I have a vision in my head and I am trying to put it on a canvas. Kinda cool once again in my head.

This is me right now at 12:30 at night. Excited to be here and tired too. I love having passion for what I want and love . I love the feeling of wanting something that I have to work hard to learn and understand . I was thinking shit in 8 years when I turn 50 I will be a way better artist. I can't wait. Oh and in the running world maybe when I am 50 I will be able to qualify for Boston. (that's me being funny )
Good night.

Not sure but I like that

There is something very freeing about working on something and not having a plan. I like the feeling of letting go of any expectations of what will happen and just letting things happen. I have been showing up at my art table every night and paying attention to my creativity light bulb. I used to want to be a fast runner until the day I figured out I just want to run. I want to do what feels essential to my being and that includes lots of movement and that for me comes from running.  I have a-lot of crap that leaves my being when I run and its one of those things that just sets me free. When it comes to painting I am starting to feel the same way. I just want to create and share my stuff because I love creating and it makes me excited to be able to share. Its funny because I don't really think anyone reads my blog so it make it easier to share . Above all my silly writing is what I am working on now. Its a big white canvas and I work a little bit on it everyday. It helps me work on letting go and it helps me stay in love with my craft.  I have been feeling more free with my paint brush and it comes from practicing every day. What I expect from myself is to show up . Progress is progress no matter how small. I am not sure what I am creating but I like it. I am leading with my paintbrush and painting with my heart. Thats enough.

Etsy Love

Etsy Love.
I saw this late last night on Etsy. Its so lovely and perfect. It spoke to what I have been feeling.
You can find it here.
I love Etsy don't you ?

Letting go with paint

Letting go of the outcome is always great the hard part is really feeling that. I am practicing doing just that. I am practicing being free and just having fun. Life is not made up of mater pieces rather of little pieces that eventually will be your own master piece. 

You never know what will happen next or how it will happen but if you just show up and give at least 80 percent than it will be OK. The other thing that's great is you usually always get another try. If you mess up you take what you learned and apply it again. You try different colors and different brushes and eventually you will get that perfect color and it will be what you wanted. At least for that day. Then you show up again tomorrow and try again. Letting passion be the leader is always rewarding and who cares about the outcome when you get to do something you really love even if it only for a while that while is enough to hold you over until the next time you need to feel the need. Of course I am talking about painting right ??

What I needed to read.

Most of my days have been spent like most other moms who stay home with there baby . Home cleaning and cooking and driving to and from school and the YMCA. I am feeling bored . I am sure this has to be a normal thing. It comes with guilt. I think to myself does that mean that my kids are boring me or does that mean I am boring or am I just over thinking . What do I need to do with the little bit of energy I have left to make my life more exciting. This feeling stinks. I feel like its between guilt and sad and bored. I wonder if that makes sense. 

My kids are awesome and I know I am who I am because of them. I used to love to go out when Paola was little. I was in my twenties and I wanted to have fun. Its crazy looking back how much I have changed.  So now that I am older I know what works for me and for my kids.  Doing things with my kids that are out side of our normal routine helps. Planning events and then JUST DOING IT. I figured out that one thing that really brings me down is comparing myself to other woman instead of admiring the qualities in them I love . I really try to call my self on this when it happens. Then I talk to myself about it. What about this person makes me feel inferior and then I tell myself instead of feeling jealous or like I am less than that person why don't I try to take the qualities about them and embrace them and admire them. When I say this to myself it literately changes how the light  I am seeing the situation in. I read this today it as written by my friend that I love and admire greatly Jennifer. It really lifted my spirit and gave me strength.  Her post made me want to write this. I think that inner strength comes from overcoming the little obstacles and trying to understand what makes us think crazy thoughts sad thoughts and then when we feel great stopping and looking around at what helped us feel great. Inner strength means having to look inside of ourselves and thats not always fun but its a-lot like running you always feel better after you do it.

Running with the baby

I started running with my baby. Its easy if the timing is right . That means its close to nap time and he is well fed. This stroller is also key. We have a BOB and it makes a huge difference .

Our first running adventure was succesful we started of at the beach and ran out 3 miles he slept the whole way so it was easy but when we got the rest rooms at our first stop I had to wake him him up . He was still happy. Then we went and played on the sand for about 20 minutes so he could stretch. 

Then our run back began . He was a little fussy but I stopped fed him and he was happy. I did try and run faster to because I don't want him to hate the stroller. 

He laughed a lot and he talked and made lots of noises all in all in was good. It seems life has gotten quite and a huge part of me wishes it was a bit more exciting but most of me is content. We run I clean the house when he sleeps I paint and we go to swim practice. I am looking forward to signing up for all my races March 1st so I can get way more excited .

The end of my run . Its always nice to know I am done and it went well. I am so incredibly grateful I can run..So grateful I feel so much better and happier.

Monday Check in

Hello and happy Monday. Time seems to be going by so quickly and I believe having a baby is a great reminder. This little boy of mine will be 6 months in a couple of days. The time is just flying by.  I am being really good about working on his baby album because I don't want to forget anything. He is turning into a little boy. He is all over the place . Rolling around and talking in his cute high pitch voice. Baby talk. He loves his feet and anything that can go into his mouth will.  We are all having so much fun with him. I am looking forward to getting more sleep but that's OK. Sleep will come later. All my kids have slept with me until they turn 3 and this little guy is no different . This weekend we unexpectedly ended up running a 10 mile race. Baby Jack was pushed in the stroller for 10 miles by his dad and he was a perfect angel. He slept and then just hung out playing with his feet while his dad pushed him. I stayed behind not by choice but because I can't run 7 min miles.. I was just so proud of Jack for being such a great baby during his first race. 

Simple Weekend

Today was simple Saturday morning. I am not running today so we got up at our regular 6:30 a.m. and as baby Jack jumped I sat next to him had some coffee and painted some rocks for the little tree in our entry way. I am really loving our house and its slowly coming together. We have only been here for 5 months so eventually we will get this place finished. I do love adding little bits here and there to show my family I love them.

Our little house is slowly coming together and in the process of it I will sit in it love it and drink coffee enjoying a Simple weekend.

My Little Fish Girl

This is the kind of drawing painting that lets my imagination run free. I can totally see the story when I see images like this one. Sometimes when I run really long distances thats what I do. I see an image and I save it in my head and then I just make up the story for miles. So today I got to run. Yay me.. and I of course had this image in my head. I could my sweet little fish girl I painted last night walking home. She looks happy and proud that she was able to catch so many fish. I know its a-lot but hey…She has a-lot of brothers and sisters. I like the that you can see the paper underneath too. Its french paper..So fancy.

My little Fish girl with her proud catch of the week waling home with a huge proud smile on her face.
Have a wonderful Valentines day..

Painted Fish

Tonight I painted fish. When I was painting my sweet rose carrying girl I saw a girl with fish on her head. The story I made up before I painted her was this one. She went to the river to collect fish for her family. She was happy because her catch was so plentiful. She was walking home with her basket full of fish and she pulled her cart. The sun was shinning and life at that moment was perfect. She was in that good moment and that was enough. 

On The Mantle

Today is the second day I have been able to run with no pain. I am taking it slowly and keeping my fingers crossed .. I took baby Jack out with him and pushed him in the running stroller. I have pushed all my kids in running strollers and they have seriously improved . The best thing about The BOB are the shocks and the wrap around your wrist band so that the stroller does not get away from you . As a  mom that would be the worst thing to have your stroller run ahead of you.. OMG
So I think this is a better picture of my painting. I painted my entire living room this color, the blue you see in the back round and as soon as I get curtains I will show you.  

A Single Rose

A couple years ago a friend gave me a small card. It was an American Greeting card and it had a tiny little girl and I remember she looked some what like the girl I wanted to paint. I was inspired then and I still am. I adore little girl drawings and paintings. When I see them I feel all pink inside. I can't get enough. 

I have also been working on layering. and the more I practice the more I am able to see what I like and how things work together. 

She reminds me of a friend I made at a retreat Rachel . I love red heads. I just adore the freckles there so cute to me. I hope that's OK to say. So here is my new painting.  I felt like they were walking home from picking roses. The little girl has a cute little basket with her flowers in it. 

I thought about what quote went perfect with them. I think I found it. I am excited to say I will be putting her in my Etsy shop soon. Thanks exciting to me.

A single rose can be garden…A single friend my world.

Happy Monday

So cute So big So fast

There is no greater joy than the happiness we experience with children.
There is no other place that I rather be than in the arms reach of my children.
Therefor I am right where I am supposed to be.
Gloria King

Always Leave Room for Magic

Here she is. I finished her last night. I like that I can see all the wonderful woman who I feel I am influences by in this painting. She has her arms wide open and she is not alone . She is a true believer in the magic of our imagination. 

I just love how cute she is .

I used all the colors that make me happy. She is not perfect just like me.
I opened my easy shop again and she is for sale. This makes me feel incredibly insecure but  I am doing it. I put the link on the side bar if you are interested. Thank you and I am of to swimming.

A bit here and there

I find my little bits and pieces of creating come late in the evening. That's because everyone is in bed and Its finally me time. I have been trying to paint everyday. Even if that means I only get 20 minutes here or there. It keeps me wanting more and practicing. This picture is what is directly in front of me as I paint. I am slowly putting my pretty space together but it takes time. So I put together some of the things that inspire me right smack in front of me to keep me company. 

This is the little me that came out in this painting. I love her short hair and was reminded while I was creating her that my hair was always this length . I have been thinking way to much about what is going on with who I am. A little identity crisis going on. I am slowly coming to the understanding that I am just enough. Maybe a little more. Who I am does not need an explanation just understanding  acceptance with in myself and love.

Across her arms I out it spells out always leave room for magic. I don't want to ever go away from that.To me that means never letting go of my child like thoughts. Letting myself be in touch with my inner child and letting that child live with in my 41 year old body.

The fox is her trusted friend. He doesn't question her he accepts understands loves and listens. Its hard to find someone who will do all that and she did..So as he stand next to her he to lifts his arms...

I am really enjoying this right now

Yes, Little baby Jack is 5 months old and I find my heart skipping a beat when I look at him. He has the sweetest soul. I am so glad to be his mommy. Its a win win situation. 

I am so loving this book . Its so good and uplifting and it fits in my diaper bag. I had Isabella and Christopher read it during swimming and they agreed because they had nothing else to do but guess what they really liked it. They both read the entire book and Christopher said he felt it helped him with his writers block. 

The Michele Hill Polka dot Wimsey Scrap booking kit. I got mine a while ago but I had not opened it. I was busy but I started Project life and I used this kit and I loved it. Its go well put together and the colors are lovely . So next month I am subscribing for sure.

Here she is what I have been working on. I have been asking to the universe to help me find my space. Sometimes I feel out of sorts and so here I am arms wide open . Felling grateful but a bit not grounded. ( I think its because I can't run ) but that's OK because I have lots of energy for all my kids.