I was out for a run

Two weeks ago I was running in San Diego with my dad and when I was done I took of my shoes off and walked on the grass for while. It was one of those really really hot days so at this point taking anything off would of worked. As I was walking to my car a man asked me how far did you run barefoot ? I told him oh I don't run barefoot and then I asked him if he ran barefoot. No but then he proceeded to tell me his running story. My name is Dan but people call me trail Dan and I run Ultras. Then I said please tell me just like that. He said well one time I ran in the desert this race called BadWater its the hardest thing I have ever done.He told me if you gave me a million dollars I wouldn't run that one  again It was tough but I finished and got my buckle. He kept talking and I kept listening . ( I was in heaven) I love love hearing people's running stories . I love the passion in peoples voices when they tell you the best race the hardest and the funnest. Its so interesting. OK so back to Dan this man ran Western States a couple times and the HardRock 100 a couple times and Leadville 100. He went on and on..
I love the people you meet when your out for a run. Yes so this  is Dan above. He has been running Ultras for over 30 years. He gave me some advice about running. It was the perfect ending to my Sunday run. Seriously you meet the nicest people when your out for a run. I had to share have a good tomorrow.

Its Monday

Monday means back to school and swim team. That means a lot of time in the car. I am not sure if its the change of season that's in the air but tonight felt slow and easy. Even though I do the same drive everyday tonight that drive was beautiful. My kids felt it too. We felt the elegant stillness in the air. My son asked me quietly what I was looking forward to and I told him in 12 days I will running my first 50 miler. He was excited not because I was running a race but because I was getting to experience a first. He got to do the same thing Saturday. He had a first and I was there and he was very excited and so was I. Having first is wonderful at any age.. 

!0 miles later

I finally got to go for a run today and it was so so good. I went for a run along the coast and for an 1 1/2  I felt perfect. Here is the thing lately for about a month when I got for a run longer than an 1 1/2 when its hot I get these horrible migraines. This was me today after my run. I was so happy but now I am sitting here with one of these headaches that hurt so much I just want to cry. I drink alloy of water . Maybe its just the sun. Years ago the same thing happened. 12 years ago and I needed up cutting my hair. I have thick hair so when I run since its in a ponytail it gets heavy and I think that might be the problem. I am going to sleep now and I hope to feel better soon.

My Reasons Why

I woke up this morning and all I could think about is I need a run but my life called for lunches to be made and swim bags that I knew needed new towels a baby that needed breakfast and a baba.. so yes I still need a run and I will get it in as soon as we come home from baby swim class..all those things lead my thinking to this thought …name as many reasons as you can in two minutes on why you love to run G..
READY
SET
GO
I gets my butt outside
I get to listen to my music
It gets my body in motion
Life always seems better after a run
sweat is good
I feel stronger
if my body could thank me it would
I can eat more food
I love the feeling of the wind going through my hair
I get me time even if baby J is with me
I feel stronger after each run
I get to sing to my favorite song
watching my feet take places
Looking at the sky
Finding beauty even traffic
waving hello total strangers
Pushing my butt up the hill as hard as I can
The most important one
Feeling my body as I push it
My arms
My legs
My shoulders and making sure I control my breathing
OK
TIMES UP !
there you go.. Have a great day 

Today she is 20

Wishing my sweet P a Happy 20th Birthday today. It is a little crazy that just like that my daughter is 20. I had Paola when I was 22 and it was a rough start. I was married to this super funny always well dressed guy that was everything to me. He always made these funny noises when either Poala or I walked in the room. It made you feel pretty. I still do it when Paola gets dressed up and walks down the stairs. This morning when she was ready to go she walked down the stairs and I made that noise and said Happy Birthday P and it was like he was here with us. She smiled big.  Her dad passed away when she was 2 . So its always been Paola and me. She is super creative and very sweet and  I love my P. 

Jack Johnson "The Sharing Song"

I recently went to see Jack Johnson with my dad. Yes I do a-lot of things with my dad. We had a good time I do have to admit it was a little weird being with my dad while a ton of people smoked pot. That was weird but besides that it was great. The music was really really good. You know how sometimes you get tickets to see an artist and your excited but you have never seen them before so your not really excited. That is how I felt going to see Jack Johnson but as soon as he started playing I knew it was going to be a great concert. I felt like we where all just chilling by the beach and he was sitting there playing the guitar singing for all of us. He has a really good voice and he was funny. I love funny. It was a full house. I highly recomend going to see him if you have a chance. This was one of the songs I liked the most.. Have a great day..

Monday Affirmations

Saturday Morning Run

Today's long run felt like this picture a little messed up. I was really excited this morning when I woke up. I had visions of running out my door early in the morning and being light on my feet and running an easy 26 miles on my own. ( I must of been hallucinating ) There is no such thing as an easy 26 miles. That's me choosing to only think of the happy miles. OK so I finally got my ass out the door around 8 a.m. lucky for me it was a cloudy morning. I ran right out my door because I did not want to drive. Sometimes on the weekend I just don't want to drive. My plan was to run across town. Across town includes lots of big hills but I felt up for the challenge. See I was dreaming . 
Here I go... I have my phone charged I have my gels I am ready.. Sometimes when I go out for these long runs I feel I am part super mom. I know its silly but I feel like I am mom during the week and  a runner on the weekends. Fighting laziness and getting stronger. TAA DAA

I got to mile 13 and decided that since my phone was about to die and I forgot my watch and I wouldn't have music and all for the other 13 miles . Somehow those thoughts psyched me out.  I  decided I would turn around and run home.  
 So 13 back all on my own. Some people love running with out music but I think better with music. The music helps me think better. It helps me filter my thoughts. I really only listen to one Pandora Station I know how boring but  it  works for me. As I am running back the sun came out and mile 17 I decided that I would run to x husbands house its kinda on the way so I stopped had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and charged my phone. I got to see my kids that was great since it was not my weekend. Then I was out the door and on my way home.. That's what I told myself less than 10 miles home. I started running home and felt like super hero twice today but soon I was super hot and somehow I lost my cape. I did make it home and I was not as fast as I wanted to be but I did fine I did not walk and according to map my run it turned out to be a 4:30 run. So if I think about how I felt this morning my run would of been a failure but thats not bad its part of the process. I am a better stronger runner because of everything that happened today. I choose to say hey I am happy happy happy. I think it was all the stops and the lights that made it seem so long..Wait it was long..Happy Miles

Grateful Friday

I am grateful for long hot races that make you work your ass off . They make you stronger they teach you that anything is possible if you train right. The heat teaches you that getting out of bed and on the road as early as possible is a good thing. Even when your eye lids tell you differently. Eye lids lie

I am grateful for my tomato plant. I am not very good with plants I touch them and they die but this year I bought a tomato plant and it did not die. Maybe my luck with plants is changing. 

Grateful for the little things that keep me close to my inner child. I love girlie stickers great pens and little notebooks..I love collecting memories of today and yesterday. I love when my daughters want to share my stuff with me. 

I am grateful for this great city I live in. San Diego always has good weather and its beautiful . The traffic sucks but hey if you leave early enough then you OK.

A day at the Bay and some thoughts

I recently took a day trip with Jack to the bay. My other kids where at school so we had plenty of time. I took my running stroller a BOB. I packed it full of goodies and of we went. I ran about 2 miles before Jack decided it was time for me to stop and play. He doesn't ride as long as he used to.So we stopped and played on the play ground until he was ready to go back.
 I had dinner with my Girl friend the other night and she asked me if I felt different having a baby at 42 versus having my babies in my 30s. I have been thinking about this a lot. The big difference is the older I am the more I feel aware of time. It goes by so quickly. So I feel very aware of how quickly Jack is growing up and because of Jack I really feel more aware of how quickly Bella, Christopher and Paola are becoming adults. 

I can't make life slow down but I can be more aware and Yup I can take a-lot more pictures. I love printing out my pictures and putting them in albums. Looking back also is a window into how quickly time flies. Christopher told me the other day ,"mom we are living the best years of our life right now ". I agreed. Its not about buying things or going places don't get me wrong I like both but it seems to me it about holding our kids and being kind to our own self so that way we can have a healthier relationship with every one else. 

I feel really lucky to just have this life right now and even though many times I wish I had more really what I have and today was enough..

Sleep Please

My little man does not like to sleep. He goes to bed early around 8pm but at 4 or 5 am he is up. My GF gave us a book and we are trying it ..We are determined to get him to sleep until 6 am. We have had a couple nights of sleep ..That to means he gets up 2 times but wakes up around 6 am. He is super happy when he wakes up and he is all smiles so maybe he is a super morning baby.. I don't know but let me tell you I would love a full night of sleep...

Weekend Update

Weekend update time. This was a successful training weekend. I found my big girl panties and put them on. What I mean is I conquered most of my fear of what if I can not go the distance . It feels good so here we go.

I asked my dad if he would fallow me on his bike Saturday morning because I wanted some company. So since I have a super supportive dad he said Yes. I really wanted to get out there early and not stop because of I wanted to beat the heat . It was a hot one. I picked up my dad in Solana Beach we drove 20 miles north to Oceanside and then we made our way back to my dads car. It was humid and it was flat because I ran all along the coast. I decided not to run on the trails because I would of had to run alone. My dad is not a big of the trails in this heat. ( me neither ) I felt great and I did my 20 miles with no problem and I needed no problem miles because I just wanted a long happy run. It was just what my doctor ordered. 

Sunday morning my dad and I met in Mission Bay around 6:30
We went around the bay once and added a little extra to make 10. I was not as hot as Saturday so that was a big plus. It was still warm . The view was beautiful but what I really wanted was to jump in the water. 

So after this weekend I had a 48 miles for the week. It was 48 miles of being on a mini vacation with lots of added heat.

What I learned this weekend was cotton T shirts are super heavy when wet. My dad is a Rock Star and you can not drink enough water in this heat. Oh I almost forgot on my run Sunday I met a man that goes by the name of Trail Dan. Super cool man . He told me some stories about his many years of running and then went on to tell me about the year he finished Badwater ,Western States and so many other runs. It was really great to hear his stories. I love people with history that love to share there stories . I hope you got out this weekend and I have less than a month until my race…I am getting excited. Happy Miles.

Favorite Running Movies

In less than a month I have my big race. The one I have been training for and I am feeling scared. There I said it. I am nervous . When I was driving up to run my first 50k I got so nervous (I got sick) but as soon as I got to mile 4 I was OK. My fear is I won't finish. I know I will finish with out a doubt but The fear is still there. So when I feel this way and I need to get my mojo back I call on inspiration.
These are my inspirational collection of movies. They are really good. If I am in the mood for a documentary The Runner is it. Then when I just want to see really good I mean crazy good professional runners I watch Unbreakable. The Last Mile is soothing good story about runners but my all time favorite is Ultra Marathon Man. I love Dean and I love how inspirational he is. Its not about running its about the human spirit and he has a very bright light in him because when I watch the movie his light shines through the TV. I am serious.  Happy Miles 

A day at the gardens

The Huntington Beach Library and Botanical Gardens are a wonderful place to visit . It goes by the name The Hunington . It is about 1 1/12 hours north from San Diego but definitely worth the drive. I have been taking my kids there for about 8 years and this was Jacks first time. I was eager to see how he would like all the flowers.

The Gardens all have a theme . This was the Japanese Garden. We had an interesting trip this time. It started of with me falling on my knees and getting an ugly cut. I am not ashamed to say that I wore the wrong shoes. Lucky for me there was a very nice lady who quickly helped me and put some ointment on my cut that helped the bleeding stop.
It was a hot day and strollers can get warm so Mike and I took turns holding Jack. As you can see its a magical place. There is so much to see. 

Here he is. I am not sure how much fun he had because of the heat but our company loved it. We did go inside all the art museums and I think the air conditioning helped because he seemed to do fine looking at the art. They have some amazing art. 

This was the Chinese garden. It goes on for 2 miles. There are coy fish and an original Chinese Tea house set up too.

Here we are and no that is not a Broncos dress . My dad always has the best smile and as you can tell we are all happy. I highly recommend making the trip to The Huntington Beach Library. Next time we go I hope it won't be as hot. 

Monday Pictures

The weekend is now behind us and here we go again a fresh new start. A fresh new week. I am starting this week of with big expectations for myself. I am going back to try that trail again and get some of the respect I left for myself out there.
 My pictures start out with my simple breakfast Items I love. Then it's baby Jack and me at swim class picture was courtesy of my daughter Isabella. Then its Rudfords a great breakfast place that my dad go to in Northpark. Its a really good but simple. Then the last picture are blankets I am working on. You love the color too…I love bright colors.. They make me feel better. 

Long Ass Run

I like this quote it makes me feel better about how crappy my long trail runs have felt. I am going to be totally honest .. Trail Running can be so difficult and I feel like it takes so much more energy ..I hate feeling like a crappy tired runner but that's what I feel like today. I ran 20 miles at Hodges and I felt tired from the get go. I am not sure why but I did. I feel like a beginner and I do not mind being a beginner but a terrible beginner. SO yes my ego got kicked in the ass. I love running I really do but runs like today make me feel like crap. 

So what choices do I have….
I don't have a choice I am not a quitter no sir. So maybe I am a crappy trail runner but the only thing that makes you better at anything is practice practice practice. Thank God I can run on the road when ever I want. So maybe when you do something that is difficult you need to to balance that feeling by doing something you are good at so you don't feel so crappy. Maybe I am slow on the trails but that only makes me want to go out more and practice practice practice.

This is where I ran today. It was hot and It was not a happy run but I pushed and somehow got 20 in…No part of today's run was easy for me but hey it can only get better….So I will try again tomorrow and take it easier and I am not going to run when its so hot..The heat plus a trail don't equal happy miles for me…Have a wonderful Sunday..

Just Love

Movement

The Big camera made it out. She road in the bottom of the running stroller and headed out with me for a mini mom and Jack neighborhood adventure. It was a hot day but I decided that as soon as Jack woke up from his nap we would head outside for much needed sunlight. Jack is an active little boy so I have started a new routine for us. We stop in the middle of my run and walk this huge grassy field . I hold his hand and he walks as fast as his little tiny feet will take him. He loves movement and he gets so excited every time he looks up at the sky. I have to agree with my little bot the sky is pretty amazing. We look at leaves and he puts everything in his mouth. You have to love this stage in life. Everything is new and amazing. So back we go in the stroller and he stretches out and puts his little foot out ..

After everyone had been picked up from school and the trip to target Barnes and Noble where  done we came home . Then the kids did there homework I went for a short run alone.

 There is something magical about evening runs. Even when you live where I do. The sun is setting the temperature drops and you feel your body get lighter almost like it knows bed time is around the corner . Its so nice to think I get to go for a run even if its a short one I will take it. There I am feeling the sunset getting lost within my run. Feeling grateful for what I have. Letting all the negative thoughts of the day behind me. I picture myself just moving along smiling excited to get home but so happy be running.

September Goals

My September Goals.. This month I am going to make sure I get some really important things done.
1. Gluten Free diet for me. This means say no to bread and remember how much my tummy hurts every time I have bread.
2. Go for a run everyday..Starting September 3rd. I am running whats on my training schedule with a watch and the other days I am just going to run..No watch
I feel I need to get back to the heart of running and that means just run G. There is something about getting outside and moving your body forward that feels so right. Life can be tough and you can feel stuck but if you just move your body and just keep moving forward eventually you will be unstuck. It helps when your sad it helps when your angry it helps when things feel wrong. Running helps clear your mind cleanse your soul. I am working on forgiveness and I am using my time running to get ME to the other side. You have to try running or walking if you have not its amazing how it nurtures your soul.
3. I am going to read two books this month.. I need to learn more.
4.I am going to put my I phone away 2 days a week. I am so addicted to my phone. I did take Face book off because it was so hard not to look. So I don't look at it as much but now but I am feeling a little angry at myself for being so dependent on my phone..really
5.A picture a day. I want to look at my month and say I took one good picture everyday. Not I phone pictures those are great but I want to use my big camera.
6. Finish the month of July for my Project Life Album. Its coming along slowly. I am only 1 month behind so tats OK.
7. Go to sleep at by 11pm.
8. I need to send out love mail to my peeps this month. I need to buy a random stranger coffee and I need to hug my kids big everyday.
9. Take 1 bath a week with out feeling guilty that I should be cooking or something like that.
10.Love more Love better Love Bigger

Goodbye August

The month was a success. I am always surprised at how fast it goes..  My kids started school today and now I have an 8th grader and a 6th grader. My oldest starts her new job friday ( so happy for her )and thank God I have Jack at home with me or I would be lost. It was a great month and as far as training goes I ran 183 miles . I ran 3 races in August and have a 50k to look forward to this Saturday. I am 6 weeks away from my big race ( my first 50 miler) ..Just typing that makes my tummy feel weird ..That tells me I am doing the right thing. The older you get its harder to find completely new experiences ..I love firsts.. They keep you growing and they keep you young at heart.