The La Jolla Half marathon

I was not planning on running the La Jolla half but a friend asked if I wanted to join the fun and I could not say no. We took of promptly at 7:30 and I knew I would have to push because I was running on tired legs. I already had 55 miles in for the week but my thought was the more tired I am the better because during these 50 and 100 mile runs I have coming up I will for sure be running on tired legs so what better way to prepare. I love this race for starters its 13.1 miles. You know you'll be done early that is a huge plus. The weather is amazing and the scenery is the best of San Diego.  

The morning was perfect. Great weather a great DJ and so many excited runners and a food truck.

I don't have any pictures of me running but I had a good race. 8:36 average pace and 1:55 finish. I was happy with that . I didn't Walton the hills and that is a big plus for me. 

Here we are after a super fun time. My friend Daniel and me. 

I also did the total fan girl thing and asked Andrea from runcoachrun if I could take a picture with her. She was so nice and sweet. She is an amazing bad ass ultra-runner.  Look at my smile I was so excited. I had a great time and I fell so grateful that I was able to take part in such a fun event !!!

Weekend Update and some running stories

This weekend was so rad !!! I have to first say thank you to my husband who loves me and thinks it is so great I love to run  and doesn't mind watching the kids  Saturday mornings and sometimes  that turns into Saturday afternoon.
I feel like we are deep in training for San Diego 100 miler. The miles are getting longer and the runs harder. It is also getting warmer. This weekend was an oh shit and yeah run weekend. Saturday I was up at 4:30 am and in the car by 5 am to get to the mountains by 7am. I had stop for coffee and a bathroom so the ride turns into 2 hours. I was grateful to be there on time and ready to do the training I find to be the hardest.  The Orriflame suffer fest. We run on the PCT for a couple miles and then down the canyon and then up again. 10 miles down and then back up it feels like so much work coming back up. I think that runs like this are so important for mental training if you are training for an ultra. Doing the long hard runs that scare you are the ones that make a difference. That was my oh shit run.. Then Saturday I had the San Diego half marathon . I love this race it was my 6th year running it. I saw a bunch of The Trail crashers before the race and ended up running with a friend Nartaya the entire race. It was a really easy race and I was so surprised I didn't have a-lot of pain. My legs felt better the farther we got into the race and we talked the entire time about our kids and just ran. We ended up with 2:02 and that was great time. I know we could of gone faster but I think both of us just wanted to run at a good pace. That put me at 70 miles for the week and well on my way to the right training I need to finish SD100 . I hope you had a great weekend and happy trails..

Friday thoughts

I heard the something the other day that really caught my attention.  Something I had heard before but had forgotten that has really helped me this week.
Do that one thing you have been putting off first thing in the morning. The one thing you really don't want to do but need to get done. It's so simple and true. Then its done and you can move on with your day and feel good about it !!
If this means go get your run done of file those papers you have been putting of filling what ever it is just do it and be done then enjoy your day.
Happy Trails and may you have a great weekend.

Tuesday Thoughts

My Western shoes are cleaned up and my butt is back at it. I am doing what I love to do and what ignites that passion for running in me .. As of yesterday I am back !! I went for a run and oh how I missed it .. Then as I was starting my run  all those feeling of man I am slow came back. Its hard to start back at something but if you don't start you will never know what your capable of doing right ? I think so many times it becomes a little scary to start but the pay off is so much greater than the fear its so worth it. Today I did an hour of core work and later I plan on doing a short jog.
Mentally I can say this for sure I feel happier . I always feel so much better when I exercise. My mantra for the last year has been baby steps in all I do. This means just keep going specially when its hard just take baby steps G.  I must have said that to myself 1000 times at Western. I still can't believe I ran Western and the amount of love and encouragement I felt from my friends and family was huge. I didn't give up because I really wanted to make them and myself proud .. That's where baby steps came in . I have  had 4 babies so I would imagine little steps but progress for sure. You know Dream Big thing you read everywhere I totally get it now. You have to see your dream to make it happen.  If you can dream it then it can be yours sort of thing. Its true !!

Squaw Day 1. We arrived

Yesterday I got up at 4:15 am and was out the door by 4:45am. Bella and I drove from my house to Sacramento to pick up the boys. I thought it would be better to have my car and all of our stuff so I drove. I am glad I did . I brought Jacks bed and his toys with me and by 4 we where all together. Once in Squaw we got settled in out cabin. (its awesome) then I called Becca and we all got together for dinner. We where STARVING.

Then we went for a walk around the village. A knitted gondola. How cool would that be in my back yard. The kids had a great time exploring. 

Look at number 4. How Exciting !! Western States Trail race. 

Home of the winter Olympics in 1960. Thats a long time ago. The village is really pretty and I can only imagine how beautiful it must be in the winter.

Here they are my loves. I am missing Paola . The weather is really nice it was in the 70s last night and no humidity. They where having a concert and we did a little walking and unfortunatly Jack fell and got a big knot but he is ok. 

The sprinklers where on and Jack thought this entire thing was a car wash. He said "running mama". This is where the starting line will be on Thursday.

Then we all went to the playground and before we knew it the mosquitos where eating us. The day ended well. We got here safe and our little cabin is perfect. We saw our friends at this point I feel like we are family. We spend so much time together. I love it. Jack's little head is ok and as I sit here drinking my coffee everyone is sleeping. 3 more days until the big race. I am going to go for a run in about an hour . I find it hard to believe that I am going to be able to run Western. I promised my self not to take any of it for granted. I am going to run with a grateful heart and practice being present. 

Monday thoughts

Today I woke up at 6:30 and the plan was to be out the door by 7. I woke up with a heavy heart after hearing about Orlando and I ended up baking my Peanut Butter breakfast bars. I can not imagine what those families are going through after seeing pictures of the actual people who had there life taken away from them my heart hurts. That's someone daughter and son. My heart just feels heavy. For me Love is Love.
I went for a run and ended up hitting the trails for about an hour and a half. Running always helps me put things into perspective. I came home and loved everyone in my home a little bit better. I showed up more throughout my day and I will keep praying for peace and Love. 

Saturday Thoughts

I woke up at 4 am this morning. Christopher and I volunteered for the woman's wine half marathon. It was about an hour away so Robert joined us and we made it there on time. We had to be out the door by 4:50 am. I really like helping out and getting a chance to be on the other side of the aid station. I have had so many people help me out at races I felt like when I can I should give back. It is really fun. I also need to keep busy because I am so crazy nervous about WS that I need to do stuff. I came home did my core work. So much fun. 20 push ups -100 sit ups -and 50 squats- lunges. I did not run today my body is still resting and my feet are a little sore. I made a  dinner- home made BLT with killer thick bacon and banana chocolate cup bread .I did not eat the bread but everyone else did. I do adore when everyone in my house has had enough to eat. That's all for today. 

My quote for today and I think its a good one.

Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of knowing 

u did your best to become the best that you are capable of being. 

John Wooden 

Be Strong who me

What do you do when you are scared to do something ?
You show up and give everything you've got.

So here I am 18 days to go until Western and lets be honest here. OMG !! I am pooping my pants. I am so scared like literally scared. My tummy hurts and I just never thought I would get the opportunity to actually run this race. I hope I did enough running and training.
Ok so here is the deal I have never ran as much as I have since I found out I got into Western States (50 to 80) mile weeks consistently.  I have never gone to the gym or done this much core work. I have never ran so many hills or run down so many hills. You know they say  it's a down hill race. A big part of me feels like what if I did all the work and I am still not a good enough runner to finish Western in 30 hours. The training camp was not easy and we had three days to do it. Maybe I should be writing that I feel strong or that I am so excited. Maybe I should be a bunch of positive stuff but man oh man I am just not feeling it. I know its just a race but It is a really big deal race.  We rented a place my whole family is flying up. I am really nervous and I hope I can let go some of this HOly Shit feeling soon because its really messing with my happy vibe. I have had this poster of Gordy running on the course for years and hanging in my closet. Every morning when I get ready to go for a run or just   look at it.. This has  been a crazy dream of mine forever and I just hope I can do it. 

Oh Happy March

Happy March Peeps.
 It seems hard to believe that we are already into march but we are. That was quick right ? I have been taking it easy over here. I had a bad week last week and one I learned a valuable lesson from. I got sick last week. I was getting a head cold with some flu like stuff. I decided to go for a run last Thursday. (sick) Even though I knew better I fought my intuition. On Thursday evening on my way home from my run I got the worse migraine I have ever had. It lasted 3 days. I had a fever a cough and on top of that a migraine that was making me nauseous all night. I was so miserable and I knew that I made  it worse by going for a run and I did anyway. I ended up going to the hospital Saturday morning and hours later some good drugs the migraine went away. The lesson I learned was I need to listen and just stop when my body tells me  too or screams stop. This all leads me to really think about what I am doing. I hate lying to myself so all this crazy questions pop into my head.. Please feel free to leave me a comment of you have any words of wisdom.
When I stop and ask myself  what is going on that I felt I needed to go for a run when I was so sick.  I have been feeling a-lot of anxiety and to be honest I am kinda like oh shit I am going to run Western and what if I don't train enough. I am so excited but also so scared. I have dreams that I melt during the run. I just feel like I have so much anxiety over this whole thing. I know its just a race but its not its THE RACE. The one race I have been dreaming about for so long. So how to deal with the anxiety that is just sitting heavy on  my chest. I heard exercise is great for nerves and I just need to be nicer to myself. I need to just let it happen. You know when your in it , When your living it sometimes its just not that easy. That's the beauty of life we learn we grow and we try and figure all the hard shit out. I have been fighting fear forever . When I feel afraid to do something I have to do it. I have to get over my fear. I know that running has really helped me get over fear in my life and more than that it has completely somehow given me the inner strength I need to let go of things that do not serve me. I think maybe this sport came at a time when I was more mature and I do not know how but through running these long races I have been able to heal. Running gave me this inner peace and led me to have this personal relationship with God. He is always out there with me and I am out there a long time. You know I spent over 30 years  carrying this hurt with me and attached to it was blame and pity and self doubt . When I started running ultras I would dedicate each race and I chose a race because thats when I about there forever. I would dedicate each one to letting go and working through some childhood issue. When I was near the end of my race and I had friend and laughed and I was so tired I was also done and able to let go of that issue. I still feel sorry for myself sometimes but now I am brave enough to know better. So maybe the key is to just keep taking care of my kids and training and then just do my best at Western. I am going to have to learn to trust the man upstairs put it in his hands and just love on my kids and make time to train. Well there you go. Here is hoping March is a wonderful month for all of us. 

A friday thought

This morning I went to the park to work out. I was not able to make it to my gym because I had a sick little boy all night and I ended up going to bed at 4am. Then from 4am on it was more of a sleep with a little boy laying on top of me sleep. I canceled my gym apt and slept in. Then later in the day when he wanted nothing to do with me and just wanted his dad I went for a short run or maybe I just wanted to get outside. I always start of slow I am a person that does things slow and I slowly adapt and running is no different even if I do it every day. I ended up running for an hour and just tinkling about lucky I and grateful I feel that I get the opportunity to train with friends who are willing to teach me and each other what they know about this sport.  I also find it surprising that I have changed so much . I never thought I would so excited about my Saturday long run but I am. I am really excited about getting up at 4am so I can be at our running location on time. I am excited about knowing I will be spending most of the morning out in the wilderness just running around. I know it will be hard but it is just that feeling that I crave. The feeling of knowing that I am slowly getting stronger. I took this picture of my girl friend last week. It looks so perfect . The trees the sunlight gleaming through the trees and a strong female running.  Tomorrow will be another glorious Saturday that for me includes a long run with friends. What does your Saturday look like ? make it a good time. 

Ultra Ramblings on not giving up

"You see those tiny switch back way in the back ? " Robert asked me. "no" I replied feeling really grateful I did not have my glasses with me and grateful we stopped for a second so I could catch my breath. This whole training thing is not easy and some runs just hurt more than others.   This week we ran on a Thursday and I heard it would be a  hard up hill and an awesome fast down hill. You may thing I was excited for the fast down hill but that is what scares me the most. The up hills are hard but I am in control . The down hills if I ran them correctly would mean I would have to let go and in my mind probably fall and this is why  I needed to show up. If it scares me I need to practice.
The whole up hill run was great except I felt like my calves where on fire. I was singing Kings of Leon on my way up. Except my lyrics where. My calves are on fire over and over. After a while it went away and I felt good. Feeling good does not mean I was not struggling it means I was not hurting at all. 

I definitely feel all excited and giddy inside when I run . I feel like its a big event. I know it is a training run but I still feel like ," Hello G  how grateful are you ? to be here in the mountains getting your butt kicked with your friends," that was my brain. I feel incredible. I feel like I do when I take my kids to the mountains or a park. When my family goes out to really fun dinner and everyone is happy. I feel like Man this is special or when I get to go to a play. I feel so incredibly grateful for this day.

The view was amazing and this was the point where I thought OK its 7 miles up and then they told us oh no we still have a little bit to go..( my brain was yelling but you said 7 ) but i acted totally cool . On the way back Robert told me to lean forward into my run. I tried this and my down hill improved some. I keep telling myself I have to believe it for it to happen. So I keep envisioning myself crossing that finish line.
Here is what I learned if your scared to try something ..anything because your fear is failure . My advise is to take a deep breath show up and try. If you fail try again and use that failure to fuel your drive. It is such a great feeling to check something off that little gremlin in our head that tells us we can't. The truth is we can if we keep trying keep learning and keep showing up. We can do amazing things. Sometimes if your like me the only way to believe it is to conquer it. 

It started getting dark so we finished up as fast as we could.
 So until next time challenging run. You might win but I will be dammed if I don't show up. 

Training Stories and dreams that come true

These are pictures I really still can't believe I am in. I gave myself around 30 minutes today to just write down how I felt about last year. I honestly feel with my entire being like one of the luckiest girls ever. I know people say fallow your dreams but really how many times can we really do that. My big dreams were become a good artist and one day run an ultra. I knew about Western States but 100 miles seemed crazy 5 years ago. I remember talking to a friend I greatly admire years ago saying wouldn't it be amazing if one year we ran Western States and thinking I wonder how you train for that kind of race. Then thinking I could never do that. 

 Cuyamaca 100k. I must have watched every video on You -Tube and read every blog post I could find and I knew it was going to be really hard but my friend Becca says trust the training and I did and I finished. Yes, I was near  the back like really kinda close to the back but I still had plenty of time to spare. I finished and got my medal.

 This was a couple years ago. This was when Jeff finished his first 100 mile race and mike was his pacer. Lets see they both froze there but off because it was so cold and they did not have the proper jackets. They are both really thin. Jeff had tummy issues and couldn't eat for a long time. His wife stayed up all night crewing him and he kept running it. I drove to the finish line with my kids to see him finish and  when I saw him running toward that finish line after 30 hours of running that was it for me. I saw the look on his face and I was so  impressed and my heart filled with a huge ass amount of Joy for my best friend husband. I was was over joyed for Jeff and that he accomplished what he set out to do. I was also impressed that Mike would run over 40 miles for his friend . I thought that is a really giving thing to do. When I was driving home that day I thought to myself . I am going to run 100 miles. I want to do that one day.

Fast forward 3 years and a baby . I made it last year to my first 100 mile race. There is so much I feel when I write that. My life I feel has been enriched so much by running this last year. I feel like I have something that is mine. When you have 4 kids your life is mostly about taking care of your family. I love that but my oldest is 21 so lets just say I have been doing it for a long time right ? I feel like now I finally am having time to fallow my dream and I have someone that is totally supportive of that dream. I also found a group of people to train with that have been so patient and really good about training and super knowledgeable about what it takes to run 100 miles . How awesome is that.  Running 100 miles was crazy hard . I do not think my smile would of been that big had I known what was in store for me.

Jeff was my pacer. I wish I could give him an award for putting up with my crap all night. He was super supportive and just kept me going. I can say this … That was the longest night of my life. I am sure Jeff can say it was not the best night for him either. He got me through it and his wife crewed me. She brought me food and changed my clothes and was super supportive. Mike took care of Jack so I could run not only on this day but the last 6 months leading unto this race on Saturday and Sunday morning and he never made me feel bad about being gone. Everyone came together for me. 

 This was taken after I crossed the finish line. 31hours and 29 minutes I think or more I am not sure. I was crying because I felt so humbled and raw. I felt loved and tired and so proud that I somehow with the help of my friends I finished. I Gloria King finished my first 100 mile race and I was only about 20 minutes away from the cut off but I still did it. I accomplished one of the biggest dreams I could dream. Let me tell you running The SD 100 is no joke. You have to train for this distance if your anything like me you have to train and pray a lot. Dear God, Please let me finish under 32 hours please      and he did.  You know when I am at the  finish line looking around I got to say I did it. It was not pretty but I got it done.

 Then Jeff got into Western States last year. When I found out he git in I was in a parking lot at Hodges and he was running the The North Face 50 miler. I immediately called his wife I was so excited for him . She told me he was running and that she would let him know as soon as she could. I was so happy for him. He is a great super strong runner and I love his family. Then he asked if I would pace him but just let me say that I am sure I said hey if you don't find anyone I am free to pace you :)  He asked I aid yes and I was so lucky because he was nothing like me. I paced him the last 38 miles and he was strong never complained and just kept moving. Nothing like when he paced me. (poor guy) He finished and got his amazing bad ass buckle.

Then this year this year I had one ticket. I really did not think there was any chance I would get in. It takes people years right ? So here I was planning my next race so I could get another ticket and then boom… It happened I was chosen number 297. Only 3 numbers to go and I was picked. I am super excited and trying to figure out training. I am still in disbelief . I will writting all about what I am doing to get ready for this epic year of getting ready for a race I really did not even have the balls to really dream about but I did dream about a little . So here goes my official training starts this weekend.

Lake Cuyamaca

 When you hear there is snow an hour away you get in the car and drive to it. When you see it is only a little bit of snow you smile because you really don't have snow clothes and a little bit of snow when your 2 is better than no snow if you ask me.

 When I stood here taking this pictureI thought to myself this is mile 90 of the SD100. That felt really weird because at that time I was so tired and falling apart. I could see myself running or walking right where I stood. I had the best pacer who kept me going. ( Jeff H)

 Its always twice as fun with a 2 year old. Everything takes twice as long and there curiosity is so good for perspective. We see a lake they see an ocean. Everything is new and bigger than life.

I am so glad we got outside and took the time to jus walk and look at everything slowly. Yes, it was cold and yes he threw a little temper tantrum but it was still so worth it. 

Its a healthy thing

The weather report said it is going rain for three days so just in case I got out the door as early as I could. That's how today's run began. I drove to the trails and went out for two hours. It was a beautiful morning and I am so glad I got out of the house and had my me time. Here is one of the things about getting out . When I go work out at the gym I totally get that angst about showing up. I know its going to be hard and I also know that I am going to be very sore the next day but after I show up I feel so good even if I can't sit down. I feel good about myself. Feeling good about yourself is just a HEALTHY thing.  I know getting started can be hard but that should not stop you from going for it. If you don't start now then when ???             

It is the beginning of a new year that makes it a perfect time to try something new. Why not ?
It might feel like stepping off a cliff only to find solid ground beneath you.

Its the end of the year

The end of the year is here..  and man I have a had a wonderful year. I never thought I would be in this  great place. Things are good. The number  #1 thing I have learned is that if you find something you LOVE something that fills your heart and soul. Something you do not get tired of doing. DO IT

You do not have to be good at it when you start . You do have to practice practice and show up. 
I have hobbies that I just love. I found running and 14 years later I still love it. I think its the longest relationship I have ever had. This activity has taught me so much about myself and had humbled me at the same time. The biggest thing that it is OK for a me a mother of 4 to take time for myself. That guilt you carry as a mom when you leave for weekend or a couple hours  is real but I have learned that I deserve time for me. I feel like running makes me feel excited and that flows into my life as a mother.
 I had a really exciting time running this year. Distances I dreamt of running but never thought I would be able to.
Finishing the San Diego Grand Slam is by far my biggest running accomplishment for 2015 with that came running my first and what I thought might be my only 100 miler. My first 100k that was the hardest on my body but I got through it. Then I found out I somehow by the grace of God got into Western States 2016.(WTF) I am so excited and I feel so lucky to have such a great opportunity. I have been spending time just trying to figure out what I need to do to succeed. My family is 100 percent in and willing to help how ever they can. I am so grateful. My dream is to go to Auburn and just have a great race and that means finishing in under 30 hours.

A mini day trip ADVENTURE

Hi Peeps.. How is your week going ? I have had an easy week over here.  Driving my kids to school and doing laundry but I have been able to get my runs in even if they are short and a couple workouts in. Yesterday I took as mini road trip with my dad and Jack to Palomar Mountain. It is about and hour and half from my house so not to far but it is a slow 1:30 because it is a very windy road.( I don't like those roads ) Jack was practicing his patience and he did well. When we finally arrived it cost 7$ to go into the Park for the day and guess what we where the only people there. There was no one else in sight and ours was the only car. It was beautiful . The leaves are all changing color and it felt like a really good fall weather. When you live in San Diego you have to enjoy it when you can capture this feeling. Jack was so excited to get out of the car and run around. Let's go run mama.. 

The elevation was 5500 feet and it was 65 degrees. We saw deer and ducks. We threw stick in the pond and collected acorns. We crossed a bridge and smelled a pine tree and the best part was when my dad Jack and I where all sitting on a huge log and Jack held us both really tight and looked up at my dad and said oh grampa .. It was special for sure. This kid brings out the best in me. 

When your little a pond is awesome. He yelled at the ducks and he would look at the water and say two trees mama. I think he saw the reflection and was showing me the two trees. We hiked for about 3 hours. I definitely got my work out in because half of that hike I carried Jack. He can get heavy. 

My favorite picture from yesterday. My little boy exploring. I really can't complain about anything. I feel so full of hope and joy and when I see this it helps me look at our future in a soft light. I love how much Joy a couple hours outside brings us. I love that I get to show my kids the parts of life I feel are so important and in doing so they to will see the soft light that can surround our life. Yesterday was a really good day. One I won't forget anytime soon. 

3 things I am LOVING right now

I thought it would be fun to start of the week with all the stuff I am obsessing over right now.  I had a great run yesterday. 16 miles on the trails with my awesome friends and it was just so good. Yes, they had to wait for me because there all faster than me but I did not take away from how good I felt. The cold made it feel more adventurous than it really was but it was so fun. So holding on to that spirit I though I would share some other things I have come across lately that have made me feel this happy.
1. I found this great website ..Simple Green Smoothies 
I signed up for the 30 day challenge and I am really excited about fallowing along and making some healthier eating habits a part of my life. I even bought a new Blender.. (thank you ladies at simple green smoothies )

I went to Sedona a couple years ago to spend time with some beautiful woman. What we had in common is we all loved to create. It's was there that I met Rachel Awes. She was light and had a lovely colorful nurturing soul. Her art is truly magical .
2. She just wrote a book. The Great Okayness and you can her and her book here. Rachel Awes  . You know how in life sometimes you come across someone and they leave an imprint in your heart forever . She does that in life and you feel her in her books. I can't say enough good things about her so I hope you take the time to check her out and pick up a copy of her book.
3. I have been trying to not sign up for any races for next year because I have been trying to give my body rest time but that is not really working out for me. So I have been looking daily at ultra sign ups. I just want to look and see what if anything moves me and yesterday something did. It moved me to sign up. The Moab Red hot 55k   I found this video on you tube and I do not know the runner but it is a really good preview of the race course. It looks like so much fun. and I feel really excited about having a race to look forward to in a brand new place I have never run before.. I love adventures in new places. So there it is 3 things I am all excited about !!

A quick re-start

I seemed to be in a hurry from the moment I woke up so I decided I needed to stop for a second before we took off. I lay ed on the ground closed my eyes and counted ten things I need to slow down for then I counted to 50 and started over. I believe it is totally OK to stop and restart your morning. Then somehow things just went a little bit slower and I felt better. Today we explored trains looked at art exhibits and fed the ducks. 

November

Can you believe it is already November ? This year went by quickly. It still feels like summer here. I took this picture today at 9am . It was a already starting to get get warm. I started of this month by going to watch a race. It was really great. Jack and Christopher had a good time running around the park. I love getting outside and as much as I dislike getting up in the morning I love getting out side in the morning. hmmm That does not really make sense Right. So as I do at the beginning of every month I made some goals for this month.
Goals for November.
1. Run 150 miles.
2. Only have sugar in my coffee
3. go see 2 movies with my kids
4. go on a date w my dad
5. visit 2 museums with Jack
6. run a marathon
7. get caught up on my photo album / project life
8. Practice telling the gremlins in my head to go F---k themselves
9. go visit my sister
10. go to church
There you go. I love having goals. I think is the perfect month to post about things that make me happy . So instead of grateful I am going with happy. I am just happy to feel happy. 

Running for 12 hours . Yes I am

I did it again. There I was feeling sorry for myself for a couple of weeks. I was feeling like this flower   I was screaming for water or anything that made me feel alive again. I needed to rest but my mind was driving me crazy . It was filling me with insecurities. Your to old to run or you need to lose weight thats why your tired or maybe your just not a good runner ..( my crazy mind ) My body on the other hand needed naps. So I rested and like everything life has its ups and down and so I just road the wave. Ups and downs. I have been feeling the need to sign up for a race and I did. Tomorrow morning I will be running
The Julian Full Moon 12/24 hour run.  I know this will fill me with joy ..

I hope to feel like this flower. Big fat happy oh and blooming. For a runner like me its not about speed because there is always someone faster. Its about spending a whole day running OK not a whole day I am running the 12 hour race. Its about the experience . It's about having a goal of 50 miles in 12 hours. It's about trying something hard because its going to be 95 degrees out in Julian tomorrow. It is about challenging my self and living. Making my life fun and having a cool story to tell my kids.  You have to write your own story because nobody else will. I want to run and so send me lots of good wishes as I try to get 50 miles in 12 hours .. A bunch of my great friends will be running to so how fun ! What are you doing this weekend ? Something fun I hope or maybe its your turn to rest . If its rest up ..